So i printed out some pictures i took last summer and that reminded me of these blogs i made. I decided to go through my life since him again and god i miss the feeling of loving someone. But more on that later.
HI! Right now, i'm doing.... okay i guess? I went back to reading mangas but my drawings didn't really improove uurrrgh.
I GOT ACCEPTED AT MARIE-VIC!! <3
And i also found out i didnt need my maths of 5 to pass. So now i'm pretty much not giving a fuck about math 'cause my teacher is awful, nobody likes him.
I bought pokemon black which is excellent till now 'cause yeah , i've been playing ever since it got out in canada but am only at half way of the game and have played over 100hours already. My pokemon are lvl 50 thou... VS lvl 30s... lolz.
So, coming back to the subject. LOVING.
damn... how to put this? After being seriously heart-broken i got scared of loving again so everytime i had butterflies in the stomach i decided to ignore them and keep on living as if nothing ever happens. Honestly... i miss loving. I read all the shit i wrote when i loved him and sincerely wow.. it's amazing. I can't even imagine how happy i was compared to now. Sure, now lots of things happened and they make me happy too but i feel like something is missing somewhere. At least we're friends now and we talk almost everyday. And i don't love him anymore, that's the most important part (lol)!! I met a lot of people and one of the guys i met around February really caught my attention (and heart). We had this kind of ''thing'' but i had all those things going on at the same time so things didn't really turned out good. ''Maybe we're not meant for each other'' , ''I probably did some stupid shit that night, i'm sorry'' & ''We're still bros after all''. That killed me . But now, like 4 months after that shit happened, i'm over that shock. Anw , i'll probably write in here soon again 'cause i think this helps me and my mentality.
& I don't care about wasting my precious 11h11. I know my wishes are a waste. But somehow it warms my heart up. somehow it also scares me to death.
THAT SMILE.
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